As the body can fail its purpose for lack of nourishment, so can the soul. We all need the light of God's reality, the nourishment of His strength, and the atmosphere of His grace. From Step 11 Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions
Patrick and I are heading up to Yosemite for nourishment of our souls and our marriage. I’m not sure a tent is the ideal setting, but if you’re looking for “the light of God’s reality” then Yosemite is the perfect spot. This is a picture he took on his last trip to the valley.
It’s not easy being married to me. And let me tell you, it’s sure not easy being married to Patrick. But for almost eleven years now, we’ve walked together, for better or worse, and it’s been one of the greatest blessings in my life. I think the rewards of being in a relationship with someone who is also in recovery probably outweigh the challenges. But the challenges can be, well, challenging. We both can be stubborn, self obsessed, unpredictable and selfish. On the other hand, we both are understanding and tolerant of the whole concept of character defects rearing their ugly heads. We’ve learned that timing is important. I’m loving and tolerant on his bad days, and he’s there for me when I melt down. We try to “practice the principals” in our home. We each have our own program, and work hard at respecting each other’s privacy. But there’s a 3rd program here, the program of the relationship.
After a few years of practice at this relationship deal we have also come to understand the emotional hangovers it talks about in the 10th step of the 12 and 12. But there is another kind of hangover which we all experience whether we are drinking or not. That is the emotional hangover, the direct result of yesterday's and sometimes today's excesses of negative emotion--anger, fear, jealousy, and the like. If we would live serenely today and tomorrow, we certainly need to eliminate these hangovers. We’ve had our share of those lately. So we are going back to basics. A little time together, a little 10th step work as a couple. Many of us also like the experience of an occasional retreat from the outside world where we can quiet down for an undisturbed day or so of self-overhaul and meditation.
So…..we’re gonna go bond in a tent, under the stars. I’ll worry about bears and wish I was at a spa and Patrick will sleep like a baby. But over the weekend I bet we’ll have some memorable moments and come home happy, joyous and free.
